I have had the privilege to speak with a lot of mammas who have told that although they like the peaceful parenting approach, they feel like if they're either doing it wrong, of as if it does not work for their families - and in all of these instances, I have come to the same conclusion, that no, it does not work for everybody. Now. Before you just down my throat, and go into a typing frenzy, let me explain...
It's not the the methods are faulty or that there is something inherently wrong with them, but what does happen at times, is that there is something greater that is going on, something that the approaches don't always touch upon - the issues which can come as a result of generational patterns, emotionally engrained family stories, or the child's soul purpose here on Earth - in fact, just recently I did a soul reading for a mother and son, in which the mother was struggling with her son emotionally, and for which she blamed herself immensely, when the fact is, that the son was here to teach her to release her grip and learn to view the world, behaviors, and control in another way. In their case the mom was convinced that the gentle parenting approaches were not working when the truth is that there were other factors at play.
So, today I have decided to give you three reasons as to why peaceful/ gentle/connected parenting may not be working for you:
1) Not understanding spiritual lessons:
I have learned time and time again, that when there are certain things that are plaguing a parent and child, it's because they are a) trying to release the parent from an old habit or behavior that they cannot/refuse to release, or b) replaying an unconscious story from older generations, or something that comes as a result of cellular memory - aspects in which methods don't work. c) some of the issues within the the child maybe lessons for the other parent, and the parent who is doing the work may only be touching or affecting in the surface and not deeply. Sometimes the methods, in light of this, are a bandaid, because the methods are only covering the surface of an issue.
2) Parents have a hard time doing the work:
The hardest work to do, is not physical, but emotional and spiritual. Allowing yourself to feel the feelings attached to reactions and to your auto responses and releasing them completely Allowing yourself to get the the core, of why your child my be behaving in a certain way, understanding the deep feelings attached to behaviors and allowing the full release of them in order to keep moving forward. This is necessary. When we are not allowing the full range of feelings, purposes, or emotions, that are attempting to come up, in the ways that they need to, but bury them within instead, the full purpose or change does not happen - therefore creating an emotional loop.
3) Not caring for yourself in a way that will allow your healing to heal those around you.
Mothers ARE the spiritual nexuses is their homes. We are the creators, the birthers, the feelers, the intuers, the emotional and spiritual keepers in our homes. When we learn how to balance ourselves, and feel into what a moment needs we transform and alchemize our homes from within - I have done it (and will always be doing it, because it is life time work) - but it is not possible to transmute the energies that you are looking to change, if you are not in your calm and space of power - and releasing that within you that needs to be released. When you don't heal from within you can't heal that without. As the saying goes, we are mirrors of each other - what you view in me, is a reflection of you. Learning to release old hurts, patterns and habits for ourselves - through self care and self love - create ripple effects inner units - when we don't don't care for ourselves in a way to allow release, we continue he pattern - and see and reflect them with and from our children.
My work is with moms and children is deeply connected with spirituality and learning to understand the energies within the parent child relationships, and working with those things to help bring the highest possible outcome for the parents that I work with. It's how I was able to transform my home from one of friction and struggle into one of harmony - even when there are rough times. It's not a walk in the park to have 5 homeschooled kids, it's work, and it's work that I am committed to doing - even when it's hard and even when I don't want to - because it's important and part of my mission, and my responsibility (especially if my goal is to raise children who are free from the chains of the past, but full of the strengths and lessons).
When I coach a mamma it comes from this place of helping her understand the purposes for their reasons in their lives, and then creating a program to help them work with the things that we discover, so that they can release what's not working, align themselves with the energies of what they want to create, or learn to grow into the potential that is already there.
Do you want to know more? Do you want to book a soul reading for your child or book a clarity call with me today, to help you understand what's going on within your relationship and why gentle/peaceful/connected parenting may not be working for you? You can do so HERE. I can't wait to talk with you :) If you know anyone that needs to talk, help or that you can think of that will benefit from this article, don't forget to share :D
Don't forget to join my tribe of conscious mammas for support, connection and help at, Soul Centered Mamma Tribe.